In How To Turn Around Difficult Students (Part 1), I made the case that teachers struggle with difficult students because their compassion overrides doing what is best for the student.
If you haven’t read the article, I encourage you to read it before continuing with this one.
In this week’s article, I’m going to going to show you how to turn a difficult student into just another contributing member of your classroom.
Let’s be clear. When I use the term difficult student, I’m referring to those students who exhibit frequent misbehavior, disrespect, and interruptions in learning… despite your commitment to follow through with a consequence for every rule violation.
This is key.
Most so-called difficult students need nothing more than a teacher with a solid classroom management plan and a thorough understanding of how to implement and enforce it.
Take a hard look at how you’re managing your classroom before trying anything else.
Have you taught your students—shown them—how you expect them to behave? Do you enforce a consequence every time a rule is broken? Are your procedures and transitions sharp and efficient? Are the rest of your students well behaved?
If you can answer yes to these questions and yet nothing seems to work with this one student…
I have a strategy that will work.
It’s neither complicated nor time consuming, but it does take a classroom management mindset and a willingness to set aside immediate feelings of compassion for the student in question.
Teachers who make decisions based on feeling sorry for students and their sometimes-awful circumstances can cause behavior to worsen. The most compassionate thing you can do for a difficult student is to hold him or her accountable.
But real accountability, the kind an unusually difficult student needs, isn’t for the weak-kneed.
Members Only Strategy
When a difficult student proves to be unfazed by your classroom management plan, it’s time to take accountability to the next level and use the members-only strategy.
Note: I recommend beginning this strategy on a Monday morning and after you’ve spoken with the student’s parents and your administrator. It’s important to let them know of your plans.
Here’s how it works:
Before your students arrive in the morning, move the difficult student’s desk to a location away from the rest of the students. It must be in a place where the student has a clear view of the front of the room or wherever you conduct your lessons.
No, this isn’t the strategy. I know teachers commonly move a child’s desk to keep them away from certain students or to keep them in close proximity.
This move is symbolic.
When your students enter your classroom, pull the student in question aside and inform her that she is no longer a member of your classroom.
Say, “Jennifer, because you’ve chosen not to follow rules, you can’t be a member of this class anymore. What that means is that you will still be required to do your normal schoolwork, but you’ll no longer be able to participate in any activities that involve the rest of the class.”
Anything and everything that is related to working with or enjoying you or her classmates is off limits. She must be kept apart—and feel apart—but with the same academic work as everyone else.
Sound harsh?
You don’t have a choice.
You can’t let any one student interfere with the rights of others to learn and enjoy school. And to really help her, to change the direction of her life, you must hold her to a standard of behavior required for success in school.
For the first week, leave Jennifer alone. No pep talks. No lectures. No profound words. Don’t tell her what to think or how to feel. Let her discover this on her own.
However, you must be pleasant toward her. She must see that you care about her and want her to succeed. Smiles and hellos are appropriate, but don’t overdue it. Resist verbal praise for now—even if you see improvement.
Soon, maybe within the first day or two, Jennifer will appear calmer, quieter, and more appreciative of you and her classmates. Wait until later in the week—Friday is best—before having a conversation with her.
If you see contrition in her eyes, her speech, and her body language, walk by her desk, lean down and say, “When you’re ready to be part of this class again, come see me.” And then walk away.
She must make an effort to come and talk to you. And she will. Soon.
Why?
Because it’s human nature.
We all want to feel like we are part of something. No student is immune from this desire. This is why the more camaraderie, rapport, and fun you can create in your classroom the better.
Don’t be afraid to ratchet up the joy and togetherness in your classroom while the difficult student is being kept apart. Take advantage of this desire we share to belong to something special and bigger than ourselves.
It’s a powerful force.
When Jennifer finally approaches you, listen to what she has to say. Let her do the talking. She has to prove to you she’s ready. Does she talk about her mistakes? Does she apologize? Does she discuss how she is going to handle herself in the future? Is she sincere?
If so, welcome her back. Tell her how happy you are. But under no circumstances are you to add a warning or lecture. Let your actions do the talking.
After your conversation, move her desk back and let her rejoin her classmates as a member in good standing.
And then get on with your year.
Next week (Part 3) is about your relationship with difficult students and how to communicate with them so that they’ll want to behave.
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Michael,
This is sound advice and I can confirm it works. On several occasions I’ve surprised a class by turning the desks of some uncooperative students to the wall so they were facing away from me, and the rest of the class. I explained to the ‘selected’ students that their unacceptable behavior in previous lessons had left me no choice but to take this action. They did the required work but had no interaction with other students.
I must admit the first time I tried this I thought it wouldn’t work, but it did. It was really interesting to see how other students reacted positively – we were able to enjoy the lesson and the quality of the learning was improved. I had to be really vigilant that the ‘outsiders’ didn’t try to interfere with classroom proceedings but on the whole they accepted the situation and completed the work.
I reintegrated the students after a couple of lessons and there were no recriminations from anyone. I think the ‘selected’ students had not appreciated feeling left out, and that was our starting point for the rebuilding process, when we could talk about how their behavior had been unacceptable and how to put things right.
One word of caution – I think you have to use this strategy sparingly – you have to pick your moment because it has a certain shock factor that could be lost if it’s overused.
Hi Bill,
Thanks for sharing your success using this strategy, and I agree with your word of caution.
Michael
Great site!!! Bookmarked.
What about third graders with ADHD who call out frequently and demand attention constantly? I wouldn’t be allowed to segregate him in this way. Parents would complain and the administration would step in to stop it.
Hello,
If you manage it smartly, you can and should separate the child from his or her peers. However, first you should:
1. Include it as a possibility (for all students) in the parent information packet you send home in the beginning of the school year.
2. Discuss it with parents and your administrator first (i.e., when you first notice that your classroom management plan isn’t working with this one student).
When done out of your deep caring for this student, you shouldn’t have a problem with parents and principals agreeing that it’s the best, most compassionate course of action.
If you’d like more specifics, email me. I’m happy to help.
Michael
What if the child continues to be rude/disrespectful while in separation? I have one who continually calls out and would most likely be very argumentative or disruptive, even in the separated chair.
Hi Dana,
The idea is to keep the student separated from classmates indefinitely until he or she understands that life is a lot better being part of the class. You do this by building leverage and sticking to your plan. If you have a student who behaves the way you describe in extended time-out, then he or she is resentful about something you’re doing (or not doing). Either they dislike you, dislike your classroom, are bored, etc. All students react predictably to certain teacher behaviors. In the case you describe, you have lost leverage (or never had it) and need to get it back. Otherwise, you’re left with trying to intimidate the student to behave. Please read the articles in the leverage category of the archives–and all the articles for that matter. I also recommend reading Dream Class.
Michael
I think you’re right. Thank you.
Oh, another thing, what about if more than one kid needs a time-out? Do you have more than one? Or is the idea that the warning with leverage is supposed to curtail this need?
Hi Dana,
Did you get a chance to read this week’s article? Also, go through the articles in the time-out category. I think you’ll find them helpful. If more than one student triggers a time-out consequence, then both students must go to time-out in separate areas of the classroom.
Leverage plus your strict adherence to a solid classroom management plan is an unbeatable combination.
Michael
I’m enjoying reading your posts and getting energized for the new semester! I teach middle school art and I can see this technique could be useful. However,students frequently need to move around the room for supplies etc.I foresee this as posing a problem both for the selected students and others who may ‘stop by’ on their way to visit. How can this method be effective and not interrupt the independence I’ve incorporated into my classroom?
Thanks, Morgan
Hi Morgan,
Students in time-out are no longer part of the class (although they’ll work on their own). They are separated from the class both physically and socially. As such, other students may not stop by or otherwise interact with them. When you’re setting up your classroom management plan, and teaching it to your students, this expectation must be part of it.
Michael
Michael, I haven’t read all of your writings yet, but I just I discovered “you” two days ago. I plan to buy your book this week. The school where I work has a growing number of disruptive students and their actions do hinder the learning environment of our entire school. The teachers are overwhelmed. Part of our issue is that we don’t have one disruptive student per class. Most years we have between 2 to 6 needy, disrespectful students each, and unfortunately, most of our days are spent dealing with classroom management issues rather than teaching. We do use the “timeout” model, but several of our most disruptive students refuse to do that (yelling at the teacher, screaming, throwing chairs, etc.) I know our school is not the “norm”, if there is such a thing, but the teachers are tired and looking for some advice.
Thank you. I have doubts about this but am willing to try if all else fails.
I have a group of 5-10 students who are ALWAYS a challenge. Once they get going, a larger number of students start to act out and get loud…I’ve had a parent come into class to help to no avail, then a Master teacher has come through and served a little purpose but as soon as she left, students resorted back to bad behavior 🙁 Suggestions?
Hi Rob,
Whenever your students misbehave, you must hold them accountable. Read through the Classroom Management Plan and Rules & Consequences categories of the archive, and then go from there. Everything you need to manage your classroom you can find on this website. If after working through the articles, you have have any further questions, email me. I’m happy to help.
Michael
When I isolate the child and tell them they are not part of this classroom do I also keep them from the classroom during lunch and recess time?
No, allowing the child to go to recess and lunch is fine.
🙂 Michael
This sounds great and I have done variations on it and it works, but what about the student that out and out won’t move their desk. Or then sits where you tell them to sit but moves the desk strategically to gain an audience. I am from a large urban district with overcrowded classrooms. What then do I do?
Hi Cathy,
You move the desk for the student, and the student doesn’t leave until and unless he or she proves ready to become part of the class again. Be sure and read part 3, and read through the Rapport & Influence category of the archive.
Michael
Hi Michael,
What do you suggest if I don’t have the physical space in my middle school classroom to move a child far enough away from the rest of my students so that there will be no interaction between them? I really cannot move the desk more than about 4-5 feet from another classmate’s desk. Thanks!
Hi Briana,
Time-out is a symbolic move, not necessarily a physical one. Just a few feet separation from classmates should be fine. Other students interacting with the student in time-out, however, is a different story. Once they understand the purpose of time-out, once it’s modeled thoroughly including what their responsibilities are while a student is in time-out, then if anyone interferes with this process, well then you have to enforce a consequence. Time-out won’t work in your classroom if the other students don’t cooperate.
Michael
Hi!
I just discovered your articles, and I think you have a ton of great ideas that I’m itching to try. However, I have a question about this strategy. What do you do if the student in question does not comply? For instance, I have one student who will deliberately do the opposite of a directive — she will start talking, get up and walk around, scream in her classmates’ (or even my) ears, or even hit and push both her classmates and me (for attention? Because she’s frustrated and not getting her way?) and if I tried to implement this strategy, she would not physically stay put in her isolated desk. She would physically touch other students to MAKE them respond to her (they’ll tell her, “Stop!” if nothing else.). If I did a whole class dance-exercise break, she would still participate. Her favorite words are, “You can’t make me!” And to an extent, she has a point. I can’t strap her down in her seat or force her to do the action (or not do the action). Suggestions on how to hold her accountable for physical aggression and for physically following directions (such as staying in her seat for this period) — particularly if there is limited parental support?
Hi Kara,
The individual ideas and strategies, by themselves, will certainly improve behavior in your classroom. But it is the total philosophy of smart classroom management that will really transform your classroom. The problem you refer to is much larger than the particular incident. The child is behaving the way she is because of how she’s been dealt with by you in the past. Please read through the archive, paying particular attention to…well…all of the categories. I can tell by your question that you need a new way of doing things. This website, all 150+ articles, addresses your problem.
Michael
Thank you for responding! Unfortunately, I’m just an intern (who came in a couple weeks ago) and this is NOT my classroom. So at the end of the day, there is only so much influence I am allowed. I will definitely keep these articles in mind once I finally DO have my own classroom though! I was just looking for ways to help this girl (and myself, I admit) , so I’ll read through the rest of the articles and find something smaller to start with first. Again, thanks for your help!
Okay, so my current most difficult student I have already moved his desk away from the others today (it’s a Tuesday). I just read this article and am wondering, should I move his desk back and try the “separation” starting next Monday or should I inform him tomorrow that he is not part of the class like in the article? Also, do you recommend having their desk facing a wall or is it okay just at the back of the class (I don’t have a ton of room to move him)? Thanks for any advice!
Hi Chris,
I’d move him back and then use the strategy when/if his behavior is such that regular time-out isn’t working. You also have to let his parents know what you’re doing and why. Placing the desk in back is fine.
Michael
It is interesting to see how many educators still can’t see the difference between “behavior” and “attitude”.
What do you do when students try to argue back when you try to enforce a management consequence, **or whine and say’what did I do?’ or ‘i didnt do anything’ when they should already know what they did wrong. :(:(.
Hi Stacey,
This has been a common question of late, and so will be a topic of an upcoming article. Stay tuned!
Michael
Dear Michael,
Thank you for your articles and advice. You seem to be very rational and reasonable, which appeals to me since I can tend toward the overly practical and sometimes indignant when it comes to repeated misbehavior. I recently shocked myself by saying, “What is WRONG with you?!” to a cute and sweet guy in my class. He does not have firm limits held for him at home and often, even at school, because I don’t want to be on him every couple of minutes. Reading your work gives me hope that if I can just matter-of-factly use consequences, the frequency of repeated off track behavior will slow.
Here’s my question: It would be received as highly controlling to tell a kid they are no longer part of the class because of their behavior. It would be considered labeling, defining the child by her behavior. Even the children are not allowed to exclude others from games and “clubs.” Have you had to consider the exclusion aspect of your advice?
On another note, it’s not easy to search your archive. I was able to go to Google and do a custom search on just your site, but a search button on the archive would really help. Just a thought!
Best,
Michelle
Hi Michelle,
The more you dig into the archive, the more you’ll read my thoughts and strong feelings on the topic and why and how holding students accountable (in a certain way) doesn’t label students. And yes, I’m considering a search function.
:)Michael
I’m a bit confused with some of the advice given by some of your articles… I find some points a bit contradicting – one article says not to take a students behaviour personally because it has nothing to do with you and then this article seems to contradict that point and says their misbehavior has to do with them disliking you… Which is it?
Hi Charlotte,
There is no contradiction. Being likable and never taking misbehavior personally are not mutually exclusive. In fact, they compliment each another.
:)Michael
I have a 30 minute literacy focus class with 23 students who all tested 2 or more years below grade level on the STAR reading test. I teach 8th grade social studies, a mixture of PAP and regular classes. For 28 years, classroom management has Ben a strength. I invest a lot of time on the front end creating community and establishing firm, high expectations. But this class has me reeling. First off, there is a wide range of achievement levels as well as behavior levels. Most of the students are not in one of my social studies classes. Te 30 minute time block just has not proven to be long enough to make any headway. At least 6 of the students are extreme behavior problems. Three of them are on the list served by behavioral management counseling agencies independent of the school. One parent I spoke with indicated her child had been with this agency sine 1st grade!! I feel utterly helpless and hopeless. I have never encountered this degree of feeling before. Last Friday, 2 students stormed out of the classroom, slamming books and doors, all because I asked them to please open their journals and do what the rest of the class was doing. Of course, administrators got involved and I had to writ discipline referrals, which took valuable time. The rest of the class was laughing at them, talking loudly, acting rudely, etc. this 30 minute period comes right after lunch. It routinely ruins the rest of the day (2 more periods). How would I “time out” 6 students? I don’t have that many areas of “removal” space! Any suggestions would be appreciated. I have subscribed to the email feed and am in the process of reading the various articles.
Hi Sharon,
With a group like you describe, and where you are with them and what it’s become, you have to start over from the beginning. Teach precisely how to enter the classroom and then practice until they get it right. Once they have that down, then move on to the next routine and then the next. This way, you never get to the point where you lose control. If ever they enter your room incorrectly, noisily, etc., you have them do it again, for example. It’s too late, you see, for your consequences to work. You’re right, you can’t put six students in time-out at the same time. To change the culture of your classroom, you have to start over.
Michael
Hi Michael-
Quick question for you…
I have a particular student who falls into this category, but I have him for 2 different classes (One on A days; one on B days). He is rather well behaved in the B day class (it’s smaller and so he has much less of an audience). If I discontinue his membership in the class, should it be one both days or only in the class that he misbehaves in?
Thanks so much!
Hi Jess,
I recommend only the class he misbehaves in.
Michael
Hi
I have a student in my class who I think could benefit from such a treatment. my question is that I dont have space in my classroom to move his desk, do you think it will be effective if i move his desk to where the time out desk is usually located? its as if he is in a permanent time out – What do you think?
Hi Itsy,
I don’t recommend moving his desk. It’s important that it remains in place, while he spends his extended time-out in another location inside your classroom.
Michael
Hi Michael,
I was doing research on the internet “teacher turns desk towards wall punishment” when I ran across your article. My son’s first grade teacher did almost the exact thing as you describe. Almost. She took his desk away from the other students and turned his desk towards the wall. Unlike your suggestion, he could not see the front board or areas that she taught in easily. She also did not tell the parents or administrator that she was going to do it. Oh, and I forgot to mention, my son has Autism and severe apraxia. This was entirely inappropriate. I see you say not to be compassionate to their needs. But please encourage teachers to make sure their students aren’t “special needs” before doing this. My child couldn’t begin to understand the “conversation” she should have had with him. I know. It should seem obvious. I had my kid out of that class in under 48 hours. Not all kids are being loud, disturbing or annoying on purpose.
Hi Diane,
Thanks for your comments. I agree that it is inappropriate to use this strategy with a student with autism in a regular ed. classroom. To be clear, I do not suggest not being compassionate. Quite the opposite. For a regular education student who is not making it, it is among the most compassionate strategies a teacher can use. Here is another take on the same strategy: How To Handle . . .
Michael
Would you use this strategy with kindergarten students?
Hi Sandra,
No, I would not.
Michael
lots of children who misbehave have undiagnosed Autistic Spectrum Disorders, other neurological conditions like ADHD, or mental health problems like anxiety. Your approach makes no attempt to understand the causes of the behaviour and address them. Punishing children for actions they have no control over will lead them down a dark path and most likely end up with their exclusion. My on has Aspergers and used to be disruptive. Before he was diagnosed the school took a punitive approach, excluding him from the classroom and so on. This had terrible consequences for his mental health and behaviour. But when we started thinking about his sensory needs and how to regulate his nervous system throughout the day (regular exercise breaks from the classroom etc), and a big effort was made to improve his self-esteem and manage his anxiety – only then did his behaviour improve. Now he is enjoying school and cooperating with the teacher and the rest of the class.
Also, I will just add that my son does have his desk against the wall, away from the rest of the class – but this was not imposed on him because of his failures. The teacher helped him choose a position for his desk, a position that felt quieter and safer for him, because sitting with the other children all the time is too overwhelming for him. It was done in the spirit of respect for his individual needs. He is encouraged to join in with group activities and sit with the others whenever he is feeling calm and strong enough, which he does now most of the time. He is allowed to sit against the wall when he gets stressed.
What would you do if the student you have tried to separate from the class, then decides they will still walk around the room trying to engage other students, call out (disrupts) and refuses to do any work.