In How To Turn Around Difficult Students (Part 1), I made the case that teachers struggle with difficult students because their compassion overrides doing what is best for the student.
If you haven’t read the article, I encourage you to read it before continuing with this one.
In this week’s article, I’m going to going to show you how to turn a difficult student into just another contributing member of your classroom.
Let’s be clear. When I use the term difficult student, I’m referring to those students who exhibit frequent misbehavior, disrespect, and interruptions in learning… despite your commitment to follow through with a consequence for every rule violation.
This is key.
Most so-called difficult students need nothing more than a teacher with a solid classroom management plan and a thorough understanding of how to implement and enforce it.
Take a hard look at how you’re managing your classroom before trying anything else.
Have you taught your students—shown them—how you expect them to behave? Do you enforce a consequence every time a rule is broken? Are your procedures and transitions sharp and efficient? Are the rest of your students well behaved?
If you can answer yes to these questions and yet nothing seems to work with this one student…
I have a strategy that will work.
It’s neither complicated nor time consuming, but it does take a classroom management mindset and a willingness to set aside immediate feelings of compassion for the student in question.
Teachers who make decisions based on feeling sorry for students and their sometimes-awful circumstances can cause behavior to worsen. The most compassionate thing you can do for a difficult student is to hold him or her accountable.
But real accountability, the kind an unusually difficult student needs, isn’t for the weak-kneed.
Members Only Strategy
When a difficult student proves to be unfazed by your classroom management plan, it’s time to take accountability to the next level and use the members-only strategy.
Note: I recommend beginning this strategy on a Monday morning and after you’ve spoken with the student’s parents and your administrator. It’s important to let them know of your plans.
Here’s how it works:
Before your students arrive in the morning, move the difficult student’s desk to a location away from the rest of the students. It must be in a place where the student has a clear view of the front of the room or wherever you conduct your lessons.
No, this isn’t the strategy. I know teachers commonly move a child’s desk to keep them away from certain students or to keep them in close proximity.
This move is symbolic.
When your students enter your classroom, pull the student in question aside and inform her that she is no longer a member of your classroom.
Say, “Jennifer, because you’ve chosen not to follow rules, you can’t be a member of this class anymore. What that means is that you will still be required to do your normal schoolwork, but you’ll no longer be able to participate in any activities that involve the rest of the class.”
Anything and everything that is related to working with or enjoying you or her classmates is off limits. She must be kept apart—and feel apart—but with the same academic work as everyone else.
Sound harsh?
You don’t have a choice.
You can’t let any one student interfere with the rights of others to learn and enjoy school. And to really help her, to change the direction of her life, you must hold her to a standard of behavior required for success in school.
For the first week, leave Jennifer alone. No pep talks. No lectures. No profound words. Don’t tell her what to think or how to feel. Let her discover this on her own.
However, you must be pleasant toward her. She must see that you care about her and want her to succeed. Smiles and hellos are appropriate, but don’t overdue it. Resist verbal praise for now—even if you see improvement.
Soon, maybe within the first day or two, Jennifer will appear calmer, quieter, and more appreciative of you and her classmates. Wait until later in the week—Friday is best—before having a conversation with her.
If you see contrition in her eyes, her speech, and her body language, walk by her desk, lean down and say, “When you’re ready to be part of this class again, come see me.” And then walk away.
She must make an effort to come and talk to you. And she will. Soon.
Why?
Because it’s human nature.
We all want to feel like we are part of something. No student is immune from this desire. This is why the more camaraderie, rapport, and fun you can create in your classroom the better.
Don’t be afraid to ratchet up the joy and togetherness in your classroom while the difficult student is being kept apart. Take advantage of this desire we share to belong to something special and bigger than ourselves.
It’s a powerful force.
When Jennifer finally approaches you, listen to what she has to say. Let her do the talking. She has to prove to you she’s ready. Does she talk about her mistakes? Does she apologize? Does she discuss how she is going to handle herself in the future? Is she sincere?
If so, welcome her back. Tell her how happy you are. But under no circumstances are you to add a warning or lecture. Let your actions do the talking.
After your conversation, move her desk back and let her rejoin her classmates as a member in good standing.
And then get on with your year.
Next week (Part 3) is about your relationship with difficult students and how to communicate with them so that they’ll want to behave.
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Michael,
This is sound advice and I can confirm it works. On several occasions I’ve surprised a class by turning the desks of some uncooperative students to the wall so they were facing away from me, and the rest of the class. I explained to the ‘selected’ students that their unacceptable behavior in previous lessons had left me no choice but to take this action. They did the required work but had no interaction with other students.
I must admit the first time I tried this I thought it wouldn’t work, but it did. It was really interesting to see how other students reacted positively – we were able to enjoy the lesson and the quality of the learning was improved. I had to be really vigilant that the ‘outsiders’ didn’t try to interfere with classroom proceedings but on the whole they accepted the situation and completed the work.
I reintegrated the students after a couple of lessons and there were no recriminations from anyone. I think the ‘selected’ students had not appreciated feeling left out, and that was our starting point for the rebuilding process, when we could talk about how their behavior had been unacceptable and how to put things right.
One word of caution – I think you have to use this strategy sparingly – you have to pick your moment because it has a certain shock factor that could be lost if it’s overused.
Hi Bill,
Thanks for sharing your success using this strategy, and I agree with your word of caution.
Michael
Great site!!! Bookmarked.
What about third graders with ADHD who call out frequently and demand attention constantly? I wouldn’t be allowed to segregate him in this way. Parents would complain and the administration would step in to stop it.
Hello,
If you manage it smartly, you can and should separate the child from his or her peers. However, first you should:
1. Include it as a possibility (for all students) in the parent information packet you send home in the beginning of the school year.
2. Discuss it with parents and your administrator first (i.e., when you first notice that your classroom management plan isn’t working with this one student).
When done out of your deep caring for this student, you shouldn’t have a problem with parents and principals agreeing that it’s the best, most compassionate course of action.
If you’d like more specifics, email me. I’m happy to help.
Michael
What if the child continues to be rude/disrespectful while in separation? I have one who continually calls out and would most likely be very argumentative or disruptive, even in the separated chair.
Hi Dana,
The idea is to keep the student separated from classmates indefinitely until he or she understands that life is a lot better being part of the class. You do this by building leverage and sticking to your plan. If you have a student who behaves the way you describe in extended time-out, then he or she is resentful about something you’re doing (or not doing). Either they dislike you, dislike your classroom, are bored, etc. All students react predictably to certain teacher behaviors. In the case you describe, you have lost leverage (or never had it) and need to get it back. Otherwise, you’re left with trying to intimidate the student to behave. Please read the articles in the leverage category of the archives–and all the articles for that matter. I also recommend reading Dream Class.
Michael
I think you’re right. Thank you.
Oh, another thing, what about if more than one kid needs a time-out? Do you have more than one? Or is the idea that the warning with leverage is supposed to curtail this need?
Hi Dana,
Did you get a chance to read this week’s article? Also, go through the articles in the time-out category. I think you’ll find them helpful. If more than one student triggers a time-out consequence, then both students must go to time-out in separate areas of the classroom.
Leverage plus your strict adherence to a solid classroom management plan is an unbeatable combination.
Michael
I’m enjoying reading your posts and getting energized for the new semester! I teach middle school art and I can see this technique could be useful. However,students frequently need to move around the room for supplies etc.I foresee this as posing a problem both for the selected students and others who may ‘stop by’ on their way to visit. How can this method be effective and not interrupt the independence I’ve incorporated into my classroom?
Thanks, Morgan
Hi Morgan,
Students in time-out are no longer part of the class (although they’ll work on their own). They are separated from the class both physically and socially. As such, other students may not stop by or otherwise interact with them. When you’re setting up your classroom management plan, and teaching it to your students, this expectation must be part of it.
Michael
Michael, I haven’t read all of your writings yet, but I just I discovered “you” two days ago. I plan to buy your book this week. The school where I work has a growing number of disruptive students and their actions do hinder the learning environment of our entire school. The teachers are overwhelmed. Part of our issue is that we don’t have one disruptive student per class. Most years we have between 2 to 6 needy, disrespectful students each, and unfortunately, most of our days are spent dealing with classroom management issues rather than teaching. We do use the “timeout” model, but several of our most disruptive students refuse to do that (yelling at the teacher, screaming, throwing chairs, etc.) I know our school is not the “norm”, if there is such a thing, but the teachers are tired and looking for some advice.
Thank you. I have doubts about this but am willing to try if all else fails.
I have a group of 5-10 students who are ALWAYS a challenge. Once they get going, a larger number of students start to act out and get loud…I’ve had a parent come into class to help to no avail, then a Master teacher has come through and served a little purpose but as soon as she left, students resorted back to bad behavior
Suggestions?
Hi Rob,
Whenever your students misbehave, you must hold them accountable. Read through the Classroom Management Plan and Rules & Consequences categories of the archive, and then go from there. Everything you need to manage your classroom you can find on this website. If after working through the articles, you have have any further questions, email me. I’m happy to help.
Michael
When I isolate the child and tell them they are not part of this classroom do I also keep them from the classroom during lunch and recess time?
No, allowing the child to go to recess and lunch is fine.
This sounds great and I have done variations on it and it works, but what about the student that out and out won’t move their desk. Or then sits where you tell them to sit but moves the desk strategically to gain an audience. I am from a large urban district with overcrowded classrooms. What then do I do?
Hi Cathy,
You move the desk for the student, and the student doesn’t leave until and unless he or she proves ready to become part of the class again. Be sure and read part 3, and read through the Rapport & Influence category of the archive.
Michael
Hi Michael,
What do you suggest if I don’t have the physical space in my middle school classroom to move a child far enough away from the rest of my students so that there will be no interaction between them? I really cannot move the desk more than about 4-5 feet from another classmate’s desk. Thanks!
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